A PERSONAL STATEMENT

A personal statement from Dermot Bolger

On the evening of May 25th 2010 my most beautiful and special wife – Bernie – someone who was enjoying the best health she had known in years, who was once again a whirl of energy and mischief, who looked and seemed ten years younger than she was – collapsed without warning while swimming with one of our sons. I was with her when she died at 2am the next morning in the Accident & Emergency Department of the Mater Hospital in Dublin.

Her last day was among the happiest and most active of her life. She had played golf in the morning with friends, enjoyed dinner with her family and was looking forward to her swim. Bernie had been ill for some years but was now back to full health and working and enjoying life and that absolutely no thought of death before death so cruelly thought of her. These are dark days but I am being kept going by the support of my family, my friends and my two very wonderful sons.

Her death was a total shock to us and she had no warning of it. It seems to have been from a ruptured aneurysm in her throat, though this has yet to be officially confirmed, so we are in that dreadful limbo of being told nothing until the official inquest which may take up to six months.

My two sons and I are overwhelmed by the extraordinary love and affection in which Bernie was held. She was a deeply private woman, proud of her husband and proud of her sons, but it was vitally important for her to have her own identity. Under her maiden name, Clifton, Bernie, trained as a nurse in Baggot Street Hospital. She especially enjoyed nursing old people and had a huge empathy for them. Having worked so hard in the home to raise her children during years of ill-health, in 2007 she completed a Back-to-Nursing course and absolutely adored working in recent years as an agency nurse.

It may be impossible for us to ever personally thank the huge numbers of people who wrote or attended the church, and so Bernie’s three Ds – as she called us – would like to use this public opportunity to thank all of you. No three people have ever been so well supported as we have been by our extended family. All of her friends are in our thoughts as we remember and cherish the unique person whom we were so privileged to share our lives with, for far too short a time.

 

The late Bernie Bolger’s “Three Ds”,
(As she liked to call us):
Her husband, Dermot,
& sons, Donnacha & Diarmuid,
Wish to thank all who sympathised with us
And offered us such warm and enormous support
After the tragic loss of the truly beautiful,
Truly special and truly loved
Wife and mother,
With whom we were privileged to share our lives.

We shall never forget Bernie.
We shall never stop loving her.

We hope that those of you who knew her
Will always remember her
In your thoughts,
In your hearts
And in your prayers.